my inner lizard: February 2003 Archives

what was silver blue and gold? color of the sky, right. and the karma chameleon was red gold and green. makes sense.

the day behind held moments of surprising triumph, more than enough. surprising because it should have been about screwuppage and shit like that. but no. things gelled, they coalesced, they ... fell together quite by accident generally on the 17th blind bumbling try, so all that was really required was an excess of trying. this, this i possibly can do, and continue to.

dizzy and disinclined to sleep but not nearly as much hostility towards the concept as last night so flailing away at the last few excuses between me and trying. not sitting upright not trying, but lying down quiet darkness willing rather than willful.

ok, just not yet. intentions are good though, yes?

out there, three twelve in the am, 'twas clear and quite dark, i wonder now if the streetlight was out? the storm had passed and left its world gleaming in repose. me? eh.

i was in the middle of remembering santa cruz nineteen seventy nine, maybe eighty, green dodge challenger, green heineken bottles, sammy hagar singing there's a crack in the world, which i found quite profound at the time.

i am as tired as i've ever been but won't sleep till i finish ftping this thing here and change the settings and wrapping a weblog around this URL. alice cooper is singing eighteen in my head so i set jackson browne in after him, and all's, well, very fucking weird.

i'm bored with myself.

oh, right -- there was something else. mm. it was like, oh yeah, i stole this design from myself and i wasn't even done, is that fucking feckless or what?

thought so.